Do you remember the first time your child laughed? Refused a bottle by turning her head away? Reached for you from across a crowded room? These are all non-verbal ways in which your baby communicated with you.

Non-verbal communication is the first type of communication you and your child share. You hold your baby, kiss your baby, and smile at your baby. Your baby, in turn, smiles back, looks for you, and coos in delight. As children grow they, like adults around them, communicate both verbally and non-verbally; the nonverbal communication between you and your child is an essential part of your relationship and one of your most important parenting tools.

Researchers have suggested that as little as seven percent of all communication is verbal. The other ninety-three percent takes place in the form of body language, facial expression, eye contact, and touch. There are numerous ways in which you can use that ninety-three percent to improve your parenting skill.

• Make eye contact. Looking directly at your children when they speak to you tells them that they have your complete attention. It says “You have my attention” and “I am interested in what you have to say.” If you put down your phone and look at your children, they hear loud and clear “You are important to me.”
• Speak at your child’s level. Kneel down when you speak to your children. At their level, you become less intimidating and your message more accessible, and you now have the opportunity to see from your children’s vantage point, helping you to better understand them.
• Use facial expressions. Think about how much information you can learn from a smile or a frown. You can discipline your children without a word using a facial expression to show them that you are unhappy with their behavior. A smile, on the other hand, can tell your children that you are happy with or proud of their behavior.
• Hug your children. Hugging your children tells them that you love them and that you want to be with them. It makes them feel safe and loved.